Thank you for calling Telstra. How may we stuff you around today?
[I'm adding notes to the bottom of this post as we go along so we can all enjoy the on-going saga. Because it's getting WORSE]
As I write this I’m having a glass of wine, so keep reading. By the end I’ll be quite chilled out I imagine. Or not.
It’s a lot to read. Don’t read it if you don’t want to. I just need to vent about the complete mess that Telstra have created for me. It’s good to let issues go, I do it by writing, and this one is a pure typing rant. 
So. I decided that I was done with TPG and it was time to move my home phone and internet over to Telstra! YAY! No more TPG! *does an excited dance about the joy of having internet that works at a decent speed*
I logged onto the Telstra website, looked at the bundles and found one I liked. $99/month. I get ADSL2+ with 200 of the gee bees to use, a home phone and a TBox thing for recording TV, watching movies and even adding Foxtel! Yippee!
Now to order it. I hate calling and buying things, but that’s ok. Telstra have this nifty online chat thing. It’s sort of like MSN. You click a button and they connect you to a sales person (His name was Oliver Daniel). He knew his stuff, was polite and even e-laughed at my jokes. Brilliant! So far so good. Rather impressed that Telstra have realised how to treat a customer.
It took about 40 minutes to go through everything, but he explained everything that I needed to know, all the plans, the charges, the details and even knew what the sound from ICQ chat sounds like. This man knew his stuff!
Then it all starts to go pear shaped. I’m going to put this in bullet points so we can all get through it quickly. Sarcastic side notes in italics. It’s best if you pop this song on while you’re reading. It’s the only way I got through this experience without crying.
- Someone from Telstra department A calls me and tells me I need to call Telstra Department B. No, she can’t transfer me, I need to call them. Silly me, thinking a Telco could do a simple transfer.
- I call Telstra Department B. They have no idea why I’m calling (and neither do I. First lady just told me I need to call). Never mind, person in Department B knows how to transfer a call, and puts me through to Department C. Oh good. I’ve got someone who can use a phone. I’m onto something here!
- Well. Alan (I think his name was) was quite helpful. On the 6th my TPG would turn off and on the 7th my Telstra phone would be hooked up by a tech they were sending, and I’d be online by the time he left. (No sarcastic comment. I was happy to have found someone who knew what they were doing!)
- Called Telstra a few days later and checked where my modem was because I didn’t get an email. Oh. It hasn’t been ordered yet and won’t be ordered until my phone is connected.
“But how will my internet work on the 7th if I have no modem?” I ask. “Oh. It takes two weeks from the day your phone is connected for your internet to work” he says, and then I tell him what I’ve been promised. Turns out Alan was telling me what I wanted to hear. Fail. I don’t want to be out of internet for two weeks. Fix it. - Turns out no amount of yelling and pleading will fix this problem. But they CAN give me Cable broadband. Turns out I’m one of the lucky few who can get this super fast internet and they can do it before the 7th. Right, well I’m over my rage and getting something better! Done! Hook me up baby! Tech is coming between 1300 and 1800 on Saturday. Cancel all plans and stay home, I can do that. Can they send the TBox etc with the tech. Of course not. He’ll bring the modem and they’ll post the rest.
- An email arrives with my account number, telling me to click a link and log in so they can email me my bills. Follow the instructions. That number is invalid
Turns out (after a few phone calls) that the number won’t work for a couple of days. WELL WHY SEND ME A FRAKKING EMAIL BEFORE IT WILL WORK!? - Give them my work address because getting things delivered at home is a pain. Australia Post don’t like ringing the door buzzer so it means a trip to the post office and that’s open when I’m at work.
- Tech calls me on Friday night. Wants to come at 0600 instead. I guess that’s ok, it’s either that or he won’t come. I’m not a morning person, but if it’s going to get this sorted then do it!
- Tech comes at 0615. Bleared eyed Neil jumps out of bed and lets him in. Today is the day!
- He plugs in modem. It doesn’t work with our laptops using WiFi. I tell him I’m getting rid of my Macbook, he tells me I can’t do that Great. I’ve got a MacFanboy in my house at 0615, I haven’t had a coffee and he can’t make the WiFi work. This is hell. He tries another modem. Nope that doesn’t work either. Oh well, he has another job to do next door so he’s out the door. So that’s why they call it a “Professional Install”
- I spend the next 10 HOURS trying various things to get this modem working. I google, I call people, I call Apple, I call BigPond tech support. Nope. It seems this model router is just crap when it comes to WiFi. Never mind, I’ll call Telstra tech support again. After 57 minutes on the phone the girl tells me that she’s sending another one to my work address. She swears it’s a different modem. Squee!
- Note arrives in letter box. They tried to deliver my TBox. To my home. The address I told them not to send it to. Cue shocked look from flatmate at the language I used.
- By this stage I’ve got a complaint lodged with the Twitter team, and my very own Complaints Manager who promises he will solve all problems before they happen. That will be the day, but hey. At least they’re trying. Turns out the Complaints Manager had no idea about the letter I sent the Twitter team, and he can’t access that system. WTF. Have I called a different company?!
- Call Telstra. They’re going to send another one, this time to the right address.
- Nope. An email the next day informs me that order has been cancelled. Picks up the phone again, calls my personal complaint manage to ask why. Oh. He’s not there someone tells me, and there is no where anywhere in Telstra that can help me. They’re swamped right now. Finally. Something I can believe.
- Call guy again the next day. He was off for the day, and was *just* about to call me. What a coincidence. New TBox will be sent out but I needed it today. Can I pick it up from the Telstra store. Yes I can, if I want to pay $299 for it and they’ll credit my account. Ah. No. Another 3 phone calls and someone tells me it’s there for me to pick up from the store. HOORAY!
- Store manager was nice. He must have read the notes on my file. Handle with care, may be armed, could be seething with rage. I’ve got my Tbox now. It’s a shame my WiFI doesn’t work, but ah well
- Log onto my account. There’s a charge for $9.95. That would be the delivery charge for the TBox I JUST PICKED UP. Another call to Telstra. Excellent. Woman who wouldn’t give her name promises me it’s been waived and gives me a reference number Yeah right.
- Next day wake up to an email from Telstra. Oh, there’s that charge again! F*Ck it. I’m on holidays in NZ. Time to let this one go for a while
- Telstra call me and send a text. I need to call a number and quote a reference number because they need to speak to me URGENTLY.
- Call it, give the reference. They have no idea what it’s about, transfer me to a tech support tem. They have no idea and bounce me to a credit team. He has no idea. I hang up. No one has any freaking idea there.
Turns out the muppet from Tech Support had tried to send my new modem to an address that doesn’t exist and it had been returned to their warehouse. Great. Give address again (it still hasn’t arrived at my place or work and this was a week ago) I’m still waiting for it and as I type this the Telstra Twitter team are telling me to try it out and let them know how it goes but I’m sick of telling Telstra how it goes. They don’t give a toss
- Teach your staff how to do a warm transfer. When you’ve got a p*ssed off customer on the phone, dumping them to someone else without explaining my problem just makes me more p*ssed off.
- Empower your people to solve problems. The twitter team are GREAT. They seem to be able to try and fix things. They’re fun, they’re polite. They’re everything I want when I CALL you. Other than the fact that they couldn’t give me what I wanted (A modem that works)
- Stop telling me things I want to hear. People deal much better when you meet expectations than than when you promise the world and don’t deliver
- Make notes when I call, and read them. Don’t tell me “Oh. When people give bad service they don’t make notes. They don’t want to get caught”. Seriously. That’s not what I want to hear.
That’s better than 91% of Australia. All that they need to sort out is this modem and hopefully I’ll never need to call them again. I dare not think about it.
There is something horribly wrong at Telstra. It’s customer service. They have none. They fail so completely at it.
If you like being able to call someone you pay for something and have them sort an issue, don’t go with them. It will bring nothing but rage and frustration.
Have you ever dealt with Telstra? They promise me this doesn’t happen, but I’d love to hear stories from you.
[edit 1]
The different modem they said they were going to send me last week hasn’t arrived. Checked on Monday and there was a note to send it, but it was never sent because no one read it. They said this Monday they’re sending it (for real this time). We’ll see how we go.
[edit 2]
Someone from Telstra called me at work last night. Left a voicemail with the quickest talking I’ve ever heard. Turns out they haven’t sent the modem on Monday like they said they would, and that the modem I have is the only one in all of Telstra that I can have, or I can go and spend more of my own money and buy a different one. Because they one they provide is sh*t. GREAT!
It seems I’m not the only one with this problem. Apparently the Netgear is just crap when it comes to doing it’s job as a modem with WiFi. Turn off NAT and buy something else to deal with the WiFi? Why not just sell something that does the job properly?
http://www.extreame.net.au/topic/2753-netgear-cgd24n-problems/
[Edit 3]
Someone called Frank from Service Delivery is on the case. If he can’t solve it, no one can (and I’ll just go to Optus who will solve it). Fingers crossed everyone!
[edit 4]
Spoke to a level 2 tech (Who Frank tells me normally works on networks and he’s him authorised to come out to fix my problem…) and he is coming out on Saturday morning to fix it once and for all. Or we give up. I’m hoping he gets it working so I can put all this behind me and never have to call Telstra again!
[edit 5]
Testra sent out a tech to look at it. It turns out the problem was partly a borked modem and partly wifi interference from neighbours.
Adrian (the tech) was brilliant. He tried every trick he could think of, no luck. Tried a new modem (the one I had appeared to be a bit borked when it came to wifi) and got online by changing the wifi ch on the new modem. I’m now blazing away with a 27mbit connection over wifi.
With a bit of luck it will stay stable and I’ll never have to call Telstra again. Thank you Adrian, the Level Two Tech sent to solve my problems!
33.35mb/s. Faster than 90% of Australia! *squee*
[edit 6]
Now that my internet works, we’ve moved on to billing issues! Hit the trifecta.
They had ignored my requests for Online Billing (I’ve replied to SMSs confirming my email address for them, signed up to the online billing system and spoken to people about it
The amount of the bill is totally wrong and finally..
They sent me a paper bill. To an address I don’t even f*cking live at and never gave to them.
Just when I thought it was all over, they move onto this kind of arsefuckery. Rage.
[edit 7 - the final one]
Well no one at Telstra knows why they sent paper bills to an address that is not mine, just that ‘maybe because I wrote this blog, so many people at Telstra got in trying to fix it that someone made a mistake’. Well, I’d rather not have written this but it wa the only way to get my problem sorted.
Frank has given me a credit of $136 and someone else has given me a credit of $11/month which doesn’t come close to making up for the hours and hours I’ve been stuffed around but hey, I’d rather they just sort out their customer service than keep throwing credits at me.
One more stuff up from them and I will cancel the contract and move over to Optus who seem to actually want my business.
Final words?
Don’t go with Telstra. Do not do it. It is not worth the stuffing around when there are businesses out there who actually want to help you. I regret ever signing up with them. I’m furious at the whole saga, but letting it go because they will never change.
The end.
Posted on November 11, 2011, in Big Issues, Lost cause, Rant and tagged Australia Post, BigPond, Oliver Daniel, Tbox, Telstra, TPG Capital, Twitter, Wi-Fi. Bookmark the permalink. 29 Comments.
Telstra sucks. I get very stabby when I think of them. They are upgrading our exchange to fibre cables at the moment – and are now dictating what and how other companies will on-sell plans to their existing customers. I now have to re-sign a 12 month contract with TPG for an Internet plan that is worse than what I’m currently getting (without a contract). Because Telstra told TPG this was how they will do it from now on.
I won’t even start on the appalling service every time I’ve spoken to them on the phone & the fact that they’ve been screwing us around for two months now.
Wish me luck – I wish you the same.
Holy crap. You had to re-sign with TPG? If there is a cooling off period, abort! Abort! I just moved over from them as well. They were awful.
I wish you all the luck in the world Maria! (And welcome as well, just saw you follow me on Twitter. Will get you back in a moment)
Hi Engy i was wondering is your issue resolved ?
The only reason i am asking is i work for Telstra Customer Relations and your case manager should be able to resolve this for you
i personally don’t like hearing about these experiences its not good at all.
When your case manager called you did they give you a reference number starting with SR and a 1800 number to contact them on ?
I suggest calling that number and asking your compliant be reviewed by or escalated to a team leader!
Its absolutely important that they get this resolved for you as this is definitely not a great customer experience.
If you find that you are not getting anywhere ask for it to be escalated Customer Relations are normally pretty good at resolving these types of issue
Hope i could help
Ash
Hey Ash,
I have a complaints manager at Telstra, he seems to just be there to listen to me and then make soothing noises.
His manager was worse, she called me and then had to call me back because she wasn’t sure why she had called.
I just keep listening to Yackety Sax and smiling, otherwise I’d have gone insane!
N
Oops. Just read this again after having had a coffee.
Ian is my case manager. He likes to make soothing noises and tell me everything is going to be ok. I’ve gone back to calling the normal number because he is the same as them, hasn’t actually fixed anything.
When this new modem arrives and assuming it works this time my problems will be sorted out, and I’ll be hoping like hell I never have to call Tesltra for the next 24 months lol
And I’ve just been informed that the model they told me they were sending on Monday once again hasn’t been sent, and someone suggested that I go and buy my own.
I’m just going to listen to Yackety Sax again until the next person from Telstra calls me (which they said would happen ‘soon’ lol)
Calling Telstra should be avoided at all costs, but unfortunately it’s sometimes necessary. Once the service is working, its better than anything else, but you’re right, Telstra’s biggest problem is (lack of) customer service and more specifically lack of ownership.
“Telstra’s biggest problem is (lack of) customer service and more specifically lack of ownership” <– Yes! Yes! A million times YES.
That's exactly their problem. I just want it working so I can enjoy my internets and never speak to them again for the whole length of the contract haha
My favourite part is when I call and the first department I speak to says “oh, im sorry I can’t help you, you’re on the new billing system, ill have to transfer you”. What does that even mean?
or the good old “Now that I’ve got all your details, I will transfer you to a department that can help”
Then they cold transfer you to another department and you have to go through the whole freaking saga AGAIN
Hi EnGy
I work for Telstra, and I may be able to resolve your issue. I deal with complaints and escalations everyday. I know how to operate my TIPT phone and I deal with the Twitter Team and various other departments across the company.
Send me an email with your details and I’ll see what I can do for you.
Hey Daniel,
Thanks for the offer but it’s been kicked upto something called CEO level escalations. Just spoke to a man called Frank in Service Delivery, who will hopefully be the first person in Telstra to deliver me some service.
NG
Hi Engy,
My name is Nicholas (Employee number D251774) and I work for Bigpond Technical Support. If you still need assistance, can you email me your details and any reference numbers you may have been provided and I’ll give you a call. As my college mentioned above, your situation is not one we are proud of and I’ll do anything I can to help you.
Regards
Nick
Hey Nick,
It’s with a guy in Service Delivery now who is organising a tech to come out and sort the problem or get me a device that works with WiFi, but thanks for commenting. Fingers crossed!
N
Sorry email me on the second email address
Cheers,
Nick
Big thanks to Nic, Daniel, Ash and another Daniel from Telstra who found thos blog (from Yammer I’m guessing) and have commented with offers to help(and now Frank).
Love it. If these people answered the phones, I would be singing Telstra’s praises to everyone I met!
Hi Engy
Just to let you know i referred this to my team leader (Daniel) this morning and he got our centre manager involved for you!
Let me tell you many emails where sent in regards to this and many calls made by my team leader.
It’s great to see so many people get on board to get this issue fixed for you and i hope that my input has helped get this resolved for you.
And going forward you should not have any more problems
Regards
Ash
Ash, you’re my favourite person in Telstra! Had LOTS of movement today, someone is coming out on Saturday morning to fix it all (we hope)!
Thank you so much for getting it to someone that can help me. Next time I’m in Melbourne, I owe you a beer or fruity cocktail of your choice! (Is that creepy?)
Neil
OMG – I hate Telstra, I have just come to your blog by chance from St Murphy and I cannot believe it! I have a similar shitty story with Telstra that has gone on and on. I reported them to the Telecommunications Ombudsman, one guy at Telstra, told me if I should take a moment to gather myself – i was sooo angry and then further incensed by his idiocy. They have send my case to a debt collectors who keep ringing me and sending me letters, saying if you don’t pay, we will take legal action within 48hr, this has gone on for 3 years – I kid you not! Take legal action, I have everything documented and am already out of pocket $247 for Telstras incompetence and I will not pay your friggin $500 or your 30% discounted one either! I don’t want a discount, I want my original $247 back – you bastards!!! Anyoldhoo, tried to re-finance recently and hit a big brick wall, cos guess what – I have a bad credit rating for an unpaid Telco bill!! WTF!!!!!! Grrrrrrr – makes my blood boil even seeing their logo – HATE TELSTRA, HATE, HATE! Imagine if I ran my business like that – I’d have no customers at all!
Thanks for you rant, sorry about mine!
Hey Brenda. That sounds AWFUL.
I’ve found with Telstra the best thing you can do is not talk to them on the phone. Tweet or email! Never call (which is a shame)
That sucks that they have ruined your credit rating. Have you tried calling the credit agency to explain your side of the story? Hopefully you can get it removed?
Good luck either way (and hey, this post was an all out angry rant at how useless they’ve been, don’t appologise for yours!)
x
Update! Adrian the (Amazing friendly fountain of knowledge) tech came out and got it all working perfectly for me!
Turns out I had a borked modem and interference from neighbouring WiFi networks. Everything is going as it should now. Let’s hope it stays that way.
That’s great you got everything sorted. I avoid calling Telstra at all costs. Why? Because except for the helpful employees on twitter their customer service is appalling.
Last year I had to phone Telstra for my Dad several times after they had sent an incorrect bill. It just happened to be the day his mother died. Then again we struck an issue, the day of the funeral we got home to receive a phone call from a debt collector. The day of the bloody funeral!! It was incorrect, all their fault but the damage had been done.
I tore strips off the Indian call centre people I spoke to and thank goodness have not had to call them again. Touch wood.
Dad is about to move house. Kirsty should I sign up with Telstra Bigpond he asked me? NO BLOODY WAY!!
*end rant*
Oh that sounds AWFUL.
If I wasn’t stuck with them for now I’d have left and never be returning!
We’re still stuffing around trying to get the billing right and waiting to hear back from the latest privacy stuff up they managed to create. It’s worse than flying with Tiger!
Hi, I am paid by Telstra to troll forums all day long and make soothing words to ranting customers. Sometimes I get laszy and make it sound to others that these people are totally unreasonable, whcih my team leader likes good. I’ll add my offer here as I often do to poeple on whirlpool.net.au, that if you call me at the group number at the bottom of this message or follow this link to an generic form that can’t even link your request to your logon, our system will classify your issue perfectly incorrectly and send it to the wrong mailing list who will not respond even if they did get a a perfect form-created message that makes no sense.
You will be even more happy to know that here at Helstra, we have many expert departments. Any of these can access your personal data and use it to i. add another mistake to your order, ii. share it with people that pay more than our weekly paypacket in a country where the law allows us to do what we like (http://www.theregister.co.uk/2012/01/01/telstra_data_on_stupid_insecure_cloud_spreadsheet/), or iii. reference unrelated orders and screw up your billing. I hope that soon we will have a chance to look after you and justify all the money we spend on our infrastructure, systems, policies, consultants, lobbyists and politicians- as we are all here to make serving you more complicated and the services No.1!
Oh yes, I did notice that data thingy, still waiting on them to get back to me about what exactly they leaked.
You must be the only person in Telstra who has the good sense to not use them as a service provider. I see that you’re with TPG, who are awful, but not half as awful as the Telstra Experience!
Can you steal me me a Telstra plush toy or stickers from the stationery/marketing room?
You’re right about Optus, we’d love to have you!
Glad it all seems to have sorted itself out now.
Oh. It hasn’t sorted it’s self. I’ve since made a complaint to the TIO and they can deal with it.
I am however exceedingly happy with my mobile that I moved to the lovely people at Optus. The reception has been perfect, including on the drive from Sydney to the Gold Coast the other week!
Dear EnGy, oh how I hear you!
But customer service isn’t Telstra’s problem… they don’t give a shit, it is our problem – the customer, because we are the ones that don’t receive what we’ve been promised and contracted to, we are the ones who are expected to pay for their stuff ups, we are the ones expected to pay out to cancel the contract that they broke, we are the ones who then have to spend hours of our time chasing them up to fix the problem.
Anyone who goes with Telstra and thinks they won’t have to contact Telstra again when they eventually get up and running is dreaming!
I still haven’t had the call back about my escalated issue from back in April 2011. Despite me ringing them at least once (usually 3 or more times) every month since then. Getting cut off every time they tried to transfer me or put me on hold (meaning I had to call back again and again, then proceed to explain the problem again and again! @ ash, a reference number and 1800 number to call back on is useless if no one EVER answers the bloody thing! & no one on any other Telstra number has any record the the reference number even existed! I even waited for over 3 hours for someone to answer once, and to this day no one ever has. Oh and just so you know, it was a guy named ash that called me to offer me the new plans and cocked up my orders in the first place. If you can’t provide it, don’t offer it!!!!
9 months later, I have moved house and been told I can’t transfer my cable internet service because Telstra can’t provide it to the area I’m moving to, can’t use the same modem, can’t keep the same price for phone etc that I was on because they don’t offer that package anymore, can’t transfer the old one… the list goes on, Telstra is there anything you CAN do? It’s looking doubtful. At least I don’t have to follow up on the previously mentioned issue from last April anymore.
What frustrates me even more than the lack of service and the inability to deliver what they say they will when they say they will… is that they then over charge you for the non-delivery and zero service on the next bill! So yet again you have to call them to get it fixed (at least another 2 or more hours of my time wasted plus the cost of the call… which by the way if I only had to ever call once would be ok, but when I have to keep calling over and over again it gets pricey and timely and they never ever offer to reimburse you for that even when you ask for it.) Then to add insult to injury, the next months bill arrives and it is wrong as well, and so is the next one and the next, so every month YOU have waste your own time and money calling them again again to fix what THEY have stuffed up over and over.
Dealing with Telstra is like Goundhog Day…. except no matter what you do, it never turns out right.
Well that’s my small rant, I don’t have the time or patience to write about all of the issues I’ve had with Telstra over the years (or even the ones I’ve had in the last month that still haven’t been resolved) as I have to go call them again now to get the next bill fixed… they have charged me for over a months worth of service that I’ve only had for a few days because they didn’t connect my services until 3 weeks later than the date they promised.
Might be time to take them to court with a group action to be compensated for the time, money and stress they have caused everyone who has ever had the horror of dealing with them.
OUCH. I know exactly where you’re coming from. The whole thing sounds like massive mess and yes! Groundhog day is exactly right!
They have stuffed up *everything*. Every time you call them, they stuff it up. Then you get your hopes up because someone tells you they will fix it all, then a few days later you call and there is no record of that said. ARGH!
If they can’t offer cable at your new place, go with someone else for ADSL2 if you can? I’ve been with Optus for my home phone and broadband before, and I wish I’d never left them. They have great prices and know how to treat a customer.
Best of luck with the phone call, I hope they answer you and sort it out soon :/